Thursday, July 9, 2015

Future President Allen West Presents His Future Chief Of Stuff: An Open Letter

From Raw Story,
Michelle Hickford, former press secretary and current editor-in-chief for former Republican congressman Allen B. West took to West’s website on Wednesday with a missive that claims if the Confederate flag and the Charleston shooting are related, so is the murder in San Francisco of Kathryn Steinle last week by an undocumented man and all undocumented immigrants.
Let's see... Blah, blah, cornfuckingfederate flag, blah, brown, blah, what in the hell?
"We must secure our borders, however that must be done. With walls. With the National Guard. With electro-magnetic barriers. With whatever. And we must deport those who are here illegally.
If we’re going to get hysterical about a piece of fabric, we surely must get hysterical about tens of thousands of people committing actual violent crimes."
K, mostly vaguely palatable palaver with a provably poor premise, ignorable ignorance by an ignorant ignoramus, but
With electro-magnetic barriers.

I gotta bite, Imma sparky.

Dear Dumb Lady.

Does immigrant physiology typically host a significantly higher amount of ferrous minerals, such that they would stick to your electromagnetic barrier? Or do you hope that the crystalline structure of aforesaid ferrous materials is precisely aligned, and the immigrant approaches the fence at a precise angle, thus being repelled a little bit 60 times a second?

You do know that even a really damn strong electromagnet, that can lift tons, say in a metal scrap yard, still only works its magic at a distance of approximately 18 inches with materials that have a much higher ferrous content than the aforesaid illegal, who, I would suspect, would display a serious decrease in endurance and flexibility were that the case. Ability to take melee damage might increase however. We're getting off track.

Who, pray tell, is paying the electrical bill? 800 miles of fence may consume a handful of watts. What if they're wearing shorts?

Sorry.

But, please enlighten me, boddhisattva.

Love, 
paleo

9 comments:

  1. Oh come on paleo. You know they're going to use the special right wing melanin magnets that pull illegals in for miles, yet leave their Russian nannies alone

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  2. Was it an episode of Bullshit where they built a wall to the precise specifications that have been proposed for the border wall, and had three teams of immigrant workers go under, over and through it?

    I think going through it was the quickest, as I recall. but all of them made it to the other side in well under five minutes. And I am pretty sure magnets would not have slowed them down.

    But then, we do not know how magnets work:

    http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/fucking-magnets-how-do-they-work

    wait- When did Michelle Hickford join Insane Clown Posse?

    PS. We also do not know how tides work.

    https://youtu.be/HABNe7_D22k

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    1. Actually, her stage name is Shaggy Dopey Hick...

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  3. She of course meant an electrified fence to kill anyone crossing the border, because immigrants = less than human in rightwing dogma.

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    1. Did you see from Sarasota, FL, when some damnable lunatic said the homeless aren't people and don't have the same rights we do? (Raw Story, although I can't find it at this moment. These fuckers is so goddamn sick...

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