Thursday, July 28, 2016

News Thingies

Dateline: Philadelphia
July 26, 2016

Melania Trump To Speak Later This Week: "I Have Some New Thoughts"

Dateline: Moscow
July 27, 2016

Putin In Hospital With Orange Hand: Says Spox, "He Had It Stuck In Something"

Dateline: Indianapolis
July 27, 2016

Pence: "My God, My God, Why Hast Thou Forsaken ME"

Dateline: Pensacola, FL
July 28, 2016

Stolichnaya Truck Stolen

Tragic Baboon Deaths At Pensacola Zoo: Keeper "I've Never Seen This Sort Of Savagery", "Didn't Know You Could Do That With A Salad Tongs"

Fmr Gov Jeb Bush In Hospital, "Exhaustion": Says Dr. Rudolph Hilter, Family Physician

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