Sunday, September 18, 2016

Open Packer Thread On A Phone? This May Suck But It's Stuff

Hrmph. 

Game starts at 7:30, Packers-Queens. So, predictions. 

In the new goddamn Sand-Crawler Stadium, which is why this game will be closer than is necessarily comfortable, teh Home Opener©®™ of the new money pit. Packers 23 - MN 20. 

Sam Bradford has a strong accurate arm, brains of tapioca, and a receiving corps that could be shut down by a Div. II high school. Should be weird. 

Sweetie will waggle her fingers at Rodgers as if he will notice through the TV, leave the field, drive the 3 miles to my house and take her away from a life of endless paleononsense. Protip: he won't. Second protip: no, he's not cute either.  

Imma be back on here at about 7. Probably have to do this as a comment thing. TTFN!

133 comments:

  1. 3 point favorite is bullshit, sorry dude. Coming off the tough game last week, nothing is taken for granted.

    Except by that fucking Dom Capers...

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  2. well, at least it's not Joe Buck and Troy Aikman...

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    Replies
    1. Can't stand Ichabod Collinsworth.

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    2. All of em are bad. So sick of Fuck-Weakman though....

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  3. did they have to give away tickets to keep the Packer fans out of the debut game?

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    Replies
    1. More excitement at the Metallica concert.

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    2. So, this bloody fancy retractable roof stadium was sold to us because Outdoor Football!!1!

      Blimp shot shows it suspiciously closed on a gorgeous damn night.

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    3. Not sure, actually, but the interior shot showed it closed too.

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    4. probably a lighting issue. Unless they haven't gotten the mechanism working yet. Took a couple of years to fix the Brewers stadium working right....

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  4. Bullshit nationalistic jingoism to start. Feh....

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    Replies
    1. This shocks you in some manner? At least it's not Florida Georgia Line...

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    2. Good start, bottle up Child-Beater

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  5. Sam Bradford looks like Keanu Reeves, except dimmer....

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    Replies
    1. Do have to be careful, he has a cannon.

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    2. Good pressure- is Capers sick and gone?

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    3. I think his old-guy habits are decent for a run-oriented offense...of course, who, besides the Vikings, still has one of those in these days?

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    4. I'd argue that Petersen is on a fast downhill slide

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  6. good opening defensive set. Throwing Keanu off his rhythm already...

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  7. I assume the Queens have their first 15 plays scripted - good plan 😴

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  8. Goddammit Adams. Looks like avoid call on Cobbs strip.

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  9. Replies
    1. At least he threw it downfield, we've been too conservative for too many games.

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  10. Go to hell Zygi, you worthless Sopranos cosplayer

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  11. Peppers put a hit on Bradford....

    BLOCKED PUNT FUCKING A!!!!!

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  12. Damn, we haven't blocked a punt in a longass time

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  13. Replies
    1. yeah. Jacksonville's was worse last week. If they had TOs on the last drive, the ending is different....

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  14. The iWatch, now with moar baked commercials.

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  15. Oh, shit, so the damn roof doesn't even open? Just panels? WTF?

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    Replies
    1. HAH. We only had to spend half a billion of taxpayer money, and we got a Magical Folding Rotating Roof!

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    2. Selig was a bastard. His kid might have been dumber.

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  16. "Miller Lite. Spelled Different, because saying it tastes like shit is not a winning commercial."

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  17. Collins worth giving more slobber jobs to Adrian Petersen....

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  18. Can't stand the guy. Michaels? Eh, smart enough. He'd go down on Brady in an ancient heartbeat.

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  19. Bugger. And that Carrie Underwear theme song needs to be set on fire with fire.

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  20. Dom Capers has crawled back into the coaches box and had someone turn on headphones.

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  21. Replies
    1. MN offense IS bandaids. Fuck 'em. Any other DC in the league dismantles them. Aaand goddammit b

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  22. Bradford looks 12 and high as balls.

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  23. Replies
    1. There are great MN beers - but nothing compares to a swell Bud Light.

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    2. I drank a Mikkeller 19 hop IPA yesterday. That 19th hop really made all the difference -- I mean why the hell would you stop at 18?

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  24. The Queens - DIE PAYTON MANNING YOU PRICK - is doing better than ours and he's had one blocked. ( Manning commercial, I hates him with many superlatives. )

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  25. Snap direct to Petersen - interesting call.

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  26. Peppers keeping his name out there, good, he needs a great season to go out on.

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  27. Replies
    1. He's getting time, but what now, three throwaways? Playing frakkin safe.

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  28. Another TO. Gonna hurt, awful clock management.

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  29. yeah, Capers, NOW you bring pressure? How about before the fucking 44 yard completion?

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  30. Halftime, Jaxson Walkies. Back in 15. Knew that TO would burn us.

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    Replies
    1. Offensive PI was a bigger deal. If not, field goal.

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    2. PI might have saved a pick. And Jared Cook made a bad decision, and why are they running routes short of the first?

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  31. Good lord, we need an all star performance to beat Sam Damn Bradford. Capers is a schmuck.

    And NO field position all day b

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  32. this game is making me feel bad about the election...

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    Replies
    1. But it's good news for J-never mind.

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    2. We look pretty horseshit. We are better than this, aren't we?

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    3. My liquor budget for the fall is increasing....

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  33. Don't care we missed it, I like the call on 4th & 1. Let's try to open things up a bit. Should have been Lacey tho.

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    Replies
    1. yeah, it's easy to second guess that, but in the 3rd, trying to go up makes sense.

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  34. Replies
    1. FWIW, you seem to be right about Bradford....

      It even made Collinsworth shut the fuck up about Petersen...

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  35. I WILL GIVE MONEY TO ANYONE WHO FOLDS PAYTON FUCKING MANNING.

    CRIMINAL ANTIWORKINGMAN HORSESHIT PIZZA-SHILLING JACKHOLE.

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  36. GB is making WAY more progress through penalties than they are through offense....

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  37. Rodgers is bad tonight. That CB Waynes is our offense.

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    Replies
    1. what is his goddam problem? Is the CrawlerDome that big a deal?

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    2. Did they design the field with a big hump in the middle, like the Cowboys had that gave Favre such problems?

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    3. I can't tell what AR's issue is, but our offense is borked.

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    4. That cheap shot by Sendejo is going to fire the offensive line all the way up...

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    5. GOOD. Stuff the damn ball down their throats b

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  38. They're making the fucking VIKINGS look good. Gonna give the Lions and the Bears some hope if they're not careful...

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  39. Replies
    1. Waynes really continues to be our offense.

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  40. Diggs takes a UC penalty....on the field without his helmet...

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    Replies
    1. I did like what Ichabod said, "What's Diggs going to do, he's the smallest guy on the field, just going to get flagged. "

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  41. did they just play out to commercial with a Replacements song? someone on the production team is on the ball...

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  42. your blog is thinking I am a robot. HAH. it should be obvious I am a zombie....

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    Replies
    1. Thought I turned that off some some time ago.

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    2. I am probably commenting too fast. Please slow down.

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  43. Please, world. Please. Maim Payton Manning.

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  44. Anyone who thinks Kevin Hart is funny is wrong.

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  45. Told you. The O-line swallowed Bradford on 3rd and long..

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  46. Another start inside the damn 15. Christ.

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  47. why the fuck do I care if the beer can has my team on it, when it's filled with Bud Light?

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  48. it's gonna be a long fall. Minnesota will win the division and we'll end up with President Trump.

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  49. goodnight, man. Gonna get a little rum on.

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  50. Imagine your team is suddenly the Los Angeles Rams V2.++Shit, & your Sunday dosage of games has been reduced because these losers were foisted on you.

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    Replies
    1. This mayor is a man who's hip with the kids and the Puffy... Feel the something something Lady Gaga rad.

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    2. Mmmm, yeah, I suspect you are feeling our stadium pain. Call 'em the Los Angeles Implants.

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  51. I have no idea what all the gibberish above was about (except the part about shitty beer being shitty), but the Singapore F1 race was fairly uneventful, except for this:

    https://youtu.be/8pItfo-xA0w

    That guy's asshole is probably gonna be puckered for the rest of his life.

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    Replies
    1. I'm wondering about that cat what was having his engine go sparky-spark on the way in there. (The pit? Does F1 or stuff like LeMans have a pit row?)

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    2. That's sparks from the titanium skid plate that runs under the cars. They don't normally spark that much, but this race was held at night (under lights) so they're more visible. They run the cars so low, and with so much aerodynamic down force, that a bumpy track will cause them to rub/spark a bit.

      Yes, F1 has pit row, but that was the actual race track. The marshall should not have been there.

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