Sunday, January 24, 2016

I Am Ewmer J. Twump, Miwwionaire. I Own A Mansion And A Yacht

And a permanent subscription, the Gold Premium Rutabaga level, to Ukrainian Models Seeking Green Cards Monthly. This only because as badly as he wants to bang his own daughter, she's getting a little long in the tooth for him.

So. Lil' Donny picked up an endorsement:

He was thrilled:

The crowd? Rapt adoration:

Now, to be clear, Sarah Wrinkled and Dumb was not making an 'endorsement'. Nor was she covering up for her kid; let's go with the assumption that this freakout was an effect of PTSD, in which case she once again demonstrates that she sees them as props, as tools, in her grift, to where she took an event, Track's going full Shining, and instead of, you know, helping her kid, she uses him in a wildly stupid stump speech. She was acting the debutante at her own little cornfed cotillion . She waited until one member of the clown car seemed to be on track and proceeded to try to hobo her way onto the train, trying to be relevant again.To an extent, it worked - eg., I'm writing this.

There are some who claim the Republican establishment is afraid of the electoral repercussions of candidate Trump, that he will have, for lack of a better term, anti-coattails. People will vote against their local Republican candidate because Trump leads the ticket. Clearly Trump doesn't believe that; he was so pleased to have Meth Jem and the Hallucinations come out for him that he made it an event and was there his own self.

I actually agree with the Badly Wigged One.

To start with, let's be real - Americans suck at voting. America sucks at voter education. While certainly both parties jockey for advantage and have neither interest nor need for fairness, the US Media and the post-Citizens United SuperPacs operate completely without regulation, allowing the creation of a, dare I say it, Trump-Palin ticket. I think I just died a little inside, incidentally, or at least vomited.

Continuing, the only real mainstream Republican resistance to Trumpy might be the evangelical power brokers, who are certainly aware that he does not share a thing in common with them; but enough promises to the lead JesusBeaters will quell that resistance, as Frankie Graham, Jerry Falwell Jr., Ralphie Reed et alia genuinely don't give a damn about anything the supposed Rabbi Yeshua ben-Yusef may have said. Add in that evangelical voters are among the absolute dumbest American voters, and will fall in line for anyone claiming either a bible or a collection of Hitler speeches by his bedside.

Also, none of the Serious Candidates in the Republican clown car were ever going to pull independents or any share of the minority vote. I've said it before, and don't mind saying again, that although Lindsey Graham is a goddamn lunatic in regards to foreign policy, and so completely unacceptable, in my mind, as president, his domestic policies were far less dreadful than any of the others in the Dolt Decathlon. And so, although he would put up some troubling numbers in the general election, he was NEVER EVER EVER going to win a single primary. And none of the remaining gang of dipshits, barring another Democratic Party circular firing squad (think 2004, and ending up with John Kerry, who, for all his positives, made a poor candidate especially in the transition to the modern media age), has enough white Metamucil addicts to threaten much in the general. But they are not bothered so much by that: they have ALL the white Metamucil addicts. Little voter suppression here and there and the damn Republicans get to 2020, and another redistricting year, and another gerrymander.

So, paleo, what's going to happen?

Shit, I don't know, it's still a week before the Iowa caucus, and the Iowa caucus is no longer, in fact, really never was, the bellwether it claims to be. The World's Largest Ted Nugent Groupie? The Frothy Mixture? Wevs. A lot can happen between now and November.

How about, "paleo, what are you confident about?"

  • I feel safe saying that the oxygen-tank-and-racism contingent will turn out, maybe slowly but in number, for the Republican candidate, whosoever they may be. Unless it's noted Egyptologist and street knife fighter (thanks MPS!) Bennie 'Slice' Carson, they like him, but there's something, ummm, off about him, not sure what. 
  • I worry that the largely Millenials base supporting Sen. Sanders will not vote if Secretary Clinton is the nominee. Circular firing squad, goddammit - I love Senator Sanders, and support him in the primary, but if Sec'y Clinton takes the nom, this is realpolitik, and this election is pretty damned important. Mrs. Clinton is superior to anyone the Republican monsters put up.
  • I disagree that 'Trump cannot be bought off'; of course he can, and the longer he holds out, the higher the price he fetches from those who want Rubio. It's a question of how long he wants to play the con, or if he fools himself into thinking he can be president. Not in terms of getting elected, mind you, anything can happen right now; but in terms of 'Do I really want to be president? It's a lot of work, and an awful lot of visibility to get away with incest even if I lock up 19 votes and counting in Arkansas, and those poor future former Mrs. Trumpanovas without a wig to keep warm..." 
  • And, will the Republican mainstream attempt to broker their own convention to prevent Trumpy from taking the nomination? It would be suicidal for 2016, but it's quite possible that their political calculus makes it smart for 2018 and 2020, not trying to run with that goddamn lunatic leading the party or even the nation.
I guess, then, pop some popcorn. Or, dunno, get activated. Get energized. Vote. Fucking participate. The Constitution is strong and will survive. The Earth is strong and will definitely survive.

We, living right now, may not. Certainly not in our current paradigm.

I like food. I like bourbon. I love my dog. Fish fear me. I'm very fond of seeing my wife naked. 

I choose survival, thanks.


Mr. The Bald Bastard pointed out some inelegant phraseologism in here.

Nor was she covering up for her kid; let's go with the assumption that this freakout was an effect of PTSD, in which case she once again demonstrates that she sees them as props, as tools, in her grift, to where she took an event, Track's going full Shining, and instead of, you know, helping her kid, she uses him in a wildly stupid stump speech.

To be clear, I do no not think she was anywhere close to any vector that may have come in proximity to the hypotenuse of a point.

It is common knowledge that Mr. Palin was, due to a rapidly evolving juvenile record, given the choice of jail or the military. Given that at the time his mother was growing in prominence in Alaskan electoral politics, while this sort of judgement is admittedly unusual in modern times, I suspect the judge decided to play CYA.

It is less well-known that Track Palin was apparently put in a quasi-champagne-unit in the Iraqi Green Zone, as a chauffeur. It is bandied about that while he was not discharged with cause, no one minded seeing his ass flying west.

I don't believe for a minute this is PTSD, I was positing that playing this scenario at Sarah's declared face value makes her look even worse than she does typically. She also seems to miss that Mr. Palin went to a war started by President Cokie McFootiePajamas aka Drooly McGinPants while the moron was still in office.

And stuff.


  1. I Am Ewmer J. Twump, Miwwionaire. I Own A Mansion And A Yacht and a Drum Machine Drum Machine Drum Machine

    1. I am fairly certain I need to cuddle you.

    2. I am a friend of Tim Quirk on Facehell...

  2. Nor was she covering up for her kid; let's go with the assumption that this freakout was an effect of PTSD

    I'd go with the assumption that it was an effect of alcohol abuse and a lifetime of poor impulse control and a mean, violent streak. He hadn't served overseas when he cut those bus brake cables as a teen.

  3. However; is it possible that PTSD due to growing up in that fambly?