Saturday, September 14, 2013

Saturday Night Non-ESPN-Wankers Football Post

Wisconsin - AssholeZona State:
Gary Andersen's first real test - the Sun Devils do not suck, and this is a tough game (they can't help where they are from, although in fact if any of the players had any integrity they'd go to state with an automatic death penalty for Joe Arpaio).  (I do have to say that it is nice to see a non-conference game against an actual competitive football team, as opposed to playing UNLV, Westchester Amalgamated (MA), and New Richmond Taxidermy and Hair Care).

  • Point to ponder - why does WI always get Bob Useless Griese, the Dumbest Man In Football, with a 32 IQ accent, and an enormous hate-on for WI for years? Someone drop a bridge on him.
Minnesota - Western Illinois:
Jerry Kill has HIS 4TH SEIZURE DURING A GAME. 4TH SEIZURE. WHILE COACHING. A GAME. Why has the MN insurance company not asked, um, anything? 4 goddamn seizures. This is not anything against epilepsy, I assure you. But Jerry Kill may be a saint, a guru, a pure thought form - he still don't belong on a football field.
  • Point to ponder - how many electrodes, placed where, and how much electricity does it take to animate the overrated corpse of Lou Holtz?
Nebraska -UCLA:
To my mother-in-law, to my brother-in-law, and to the stupidest human being alive, Ndamakong Suh, allow me to say

Notre Dame - Purdue:
Notre Dame. Notre Dame. Notre Dame. Nuff said. Bunch of rapists who don't deserve a minute of TV time. Yes, I know, all college football players are criminal rapist scum who do NOT BELONG in college, with people trying to get an education. But Notre Dame is treated by the media as something special. FUCK THEM.

Packers vs. Washington Klan:
If the Washington players had any integrity they would demand a name change or a trade. They won't. They are football players and thus not too bright. Well, basically stupid. That being said, facing another good running game and a mobile quarterback, another annoying game. Please, dear FSM - I know we are not allowed for some reason to run block, but for Rodgers' sake could we at least pass block?

Don't know why I even pay attention any more. Fuck all these people, useless drags on society. Its become more of a habit - none of these shitheads, owners, players, National Fuck-all League, give a fuck about the fans, not one weenciest fuck, not even the throwaway promise of a reacharound.


  1. Are you honestly fucking kidding me? That was absolutely corrupt. I am calling out the NCAA for throwing a game.

    DEAR NCAA - you ABSOLUTELY THREW this game, or the backfield judge had money on the outcome.

  2. No no no, Rodgers will run for his life all day and you will lose.

    1. I have got to get some way to watching the game (I live in a non-NFL state, they insist that Vikings games come first). Whereby I would be able to respond neatly, one-way-or-t'other, to your, obviously alcohol influenced, post.

    2. Upon further review, everyone else in the NFC Least lost, too.

      Schadenfreude loves company. Or some such.

    3. Giants:
      Younger Manning brother fucked sacrificed the wrong brand of chicken.
      Someone let Jerry Jones out of his basement again, but Tony Romo got a much needed hug again.
      Beats the hell outta me.
      Rodgers got chased all over the field and won by 18 POINTS.

  3. Still baseball season here on the Coast. But I did have some dee-lish cheese yesterday.

    1. Baseball in WI tends to end in early April. Give the Twinkies a little credit - in MN, baseball tends to be relevant until April 28th or so.

    2. Ummm, yeah, the Fermenters or something. They race sausages, which is a trick to get an engine of any size into, p'raps from a Geo.