Honestly, I Was Much More Affected By Lemmy And Bowie

This is going to be an oddly disjointed post. Sorry. Just thinking on my fingers, not actually certain what I'm reaching for, fairly certain I don't actually have a point. (Usually the music blogging is a Zombie/Bastard/Beer Snob/Questionable Content thingy.)

I wrote a post about Lemmy. At the time I struck out in my own individual musical direction, primarily 80's proto-thrash and prog-metal, Motorhead and Hawkwind were in my wheelhouse. Stuck with him for a long damn time. I suspect sections of heaven are burning, littered with angels thoroughly exhausted from right rogerings.

I didn't blog about Bowie largely because I had paid less attention to him for some time, but there is no doubt his early 70's output was amazing (and as others have said, who in hell expected Iggy to be the one living...). I picked him up in college - not going to claim that Eau Claire, WI was necessarily hip, but proximity to the Twin Cities was an improvement upon La Crosse (sells out Kenny Rogers four La Crosse Center Grand Opening shows in 3 hours this is one of 17 reasons why I have NO fucking nostalgia for home) WI. See you later, Thin White Ziggy.

Now, Glenn Frey. This is different, though. I dislike the Eagles, and although his solo output was certainly alright, it wasn't mesmerizing. Hell, I don't necessarily hate the Eagles country rock stuff, it was alright. But why do I react like that, when, to a lot of people in an range of ages, the Eagles are still huge, and I am very wary of being the sort of douchebag who hates the Eagles because other douchebags hate the Eagles. To me, the famous scene in The Big Lebowski got it close, just exasperation, fed up with them. Rephrase that as "Not the Eagles again, man". In the Twin Cities they remain a monstrous draw, due in large part to two classic rock stations, one that has the Eagles on heavy rotation, the other, KQ92, (home of the Grand Dragon and the White Sheet Bunch Morning Crew) promising and over-delivering the Eagles every five minutes on the minute.

When I was 12, La Crosse got a 'classic rock' station. Up to that time, there was country, old country, a talk radio station that had ChickenMan and a daily comment by the station's owner, and top forty. Yes, top 40 music in 1980 would have made an excellent soundtrack to steering an asteroid into the planet. And 1981. 1982. '83 to 2015 inclusive, you're getting me off track. 'Classic Rock' was different, and guitar-based (kind of a constant for me, I like's me some shredding).  I loved it, it was different, at 12 years old "Bang On A Drum" by Todd Rundgren was turn it up time. And they played the Eagles. "Hotel California". "Life In The Fast Lane". Rinse. Repeat. Loved it.

And I've now heard it. Every tune. Repeatedly. The "New Kid In Town" is now an elderly man sitting on the bench yelling at kids to get off the park.

Let's be clear.

The Eagles made good music. Professionally written. Professionally produced. F follows C♭ after the appropriate pause. At some point, the Eagles lost art and were making a calculated product. Nothing wrong with that. Billy Corgan clearly had pretensions to out-Rostokovich Rostokovich, but still did his damnedest to sell a gazillion records. (And fucking "Cherub Rock" kills, fuck anyone who disagrees.)


Hell, I don't know. Rest in peace, Mr. Frey. You did stuff to take pride in, and that's not nothing. I just heard you riding your own coattails for faaaaarrr too long, and I'm not too concerned at missing the Eagles on one of their final tour reunions.

Ok, You Bastards, Practice Starts Tomorrow

In response to correspondence with teh Zombie, regarding the end of the football season.

Yes, end of the football season. I were born and raised in Wisconsin, and despite my growing hatred of the NFL Inc. and existing blind rage at the fact that the NCAA is allowed to exist without hard-wired collars reminding them when they are being jackasses, although the electricity bills may bankrupt the nation. Where was I? Dangling clauses, apparently.

Oh, yes, so, I need the Pack and the Badgers to do well. But, once their seasons are over, I no longer give a shit about their respective leagues. I don't know or care who won the college football championship, and I won't see another NFL game. Even the Super Bowl. 

"Ohhh, but paleo, teh commercials!" 

a.) Like I have money. 

2.) Who gives a great goddammit.

So, I had to work during the Packers-Cardinals game, and only saw, live, the Jeff Janis hail mary TD reception, and then Larry Fitzgerald Jr. making Dom Capers look like he was auditioning for Dumbest and Dumbester.

I saw McCarthy yesterday tell Eddie Lacy to get the hell back in shape. 

As an aside (I know, me?), the comments on that SBNation post included one to the extent of "Lacy may be fat but I bet he could make a 27 yard field goal", which I, of course, found quite humorly, while at the same time thinking any MN fan who blames that loss on Blair Walsh is a jackass, the rest of the Queens put him in that position by shitting the bed in the 4th quarter... 

The Packers so need Jordy Nelson (WR) back on the field, and also need a complementary wide out. Randall Cobb (WR, SR, occasional RB) is good, very good, in the slot, but I'm not impressed with him outside. David Bakhtiari (Sieve, Penalty Machine, theoretically an Offensive Lineman. Got the 'offensive' part right.) needs to be sent along with Capers to hell.

Imma not primal scream, but we have work to do.

At the same time, Bob (AKA 'Lips' to Roger 'How Can I Help You, Mr. Kraft' Goodell, Jerry Jones, Dan Snyder, et al.) Costas needs to be buried under Capers and Bakhtiari - one cannot help but feel that sports broadcasters, presumably at the behest of teams with owners, want GB to fail as a franchise because an ostensibly publicly-owned entity that will be staying in place makes slapnuts like Szigymund Wilf and Stan Kroenke look like the criminally greedy grubfuckers they are. 

And Costas is an admitted ewok-fondler. Probably.

Fuggit.

Post Script: I have friends, and they're not well.

@paleotectonics @********* @************ @************ @******** you forgot Costas' eyeball STD that he got from foundling Russian ewoks

— Allen Fisher (@************) January 19, 2016

Saving 'Murica With The MegaChurch Based Economy

Once upon a time, I was a travelling union electrician.

I tended to go west to work. My preference, as I was driving like a bat loosed from Satan's grip to Siblingbunghole, Idaho, with a case of Mountain Dew, a roll of Kodiak, and a dwindling hope of picking up the call at the union hall for power plant maintenance but an expectation of putting in childproof AFCI-rated receptacles at the local Golden Corral, was to drive through mountains.

Although I do not recall the instance, at some point I must have signed the books in Colorado Springs, Colorado. Colorado Springs has been, and may still be,

home to the greatest concentration of fundamentalist Christian activist groups in American history (Jeff Sharlet, Harpers, Revealer)

including New Life, former home of Ted Haggard (I will not embed that video. I will not muddy up my own house. It's from Jesus Camp if you want an idea before clicking.) before he discovered the Joy of Meth (now on Audible.com); and home to the United States Air Force Academy, which has had, for years, a very prejudicial attitude towards any non-Jesus-Beater daring to serve their country upside down at Mach 2.25. Colorado Springs has also had, due to the presence of the aforementioned Atavisticus Jesusi Beaterodocus, a turbo-fucked local economy.

Because I signed the books there, I get email pertinent to Colorado Springs. For example, I get the 'newsletter' and 'brother can you spare a coupla thousand dimes" from this Tea Party pile of pig placenta

Because of his first name and general demeanor, he reminds me of President Bartlett's son-in-law (West Wing). Just a completely pliable dunce, eager to do the bidding of his keepers, will swallow if necessary.


Actually, pig placentas serve a purpose - they are involved in the production of ham. I may have to rethink that analogy.

Now, I also get job offers from 'the Springs', as the hip youth say. What is available in the job creation dynamic Galtian Gulch in fundie country?

Hmm. My smack is gobbed. There seems to be a trend, perhaps, nay, a pattern. Ummm.

Er.

WHY IN TEH HELL DID I EVER BECOME A HIGHLY EDUCATED TECHNICAL SPECIALIST WITH A WORK ETHIC AND A SAVAGE DISREGARD FOR ORGANIZED RELIGION?!?! CONFORM, BABY, CONFORM!!

SHEESH.

*****************************************************************
Oh, and speaking of Jesus Camp, I found out what happened to this poor brainwashed peanuthead.

He took up sportsball.

Sorry mini-dude.

Rich Snots Behaving 'Orribly

Apropo of nothing...

This is the third time I've watched some of Downton Abbey with mah Sweetie. I don't like it, not one damn bit. These are the people the guillotine was invented for. But I must say:

It occurs to me, the Head Butler is as awful a human being as the rich hemophiliacs living in the larger bedrooms. In a perfect world, I'd have one more basket ready.

Just saying.

Raise A Bottle Of Whiskey To Lemmy

Lemmy has passed away, after a short battle with an aggressive cancer.

The absolute bad-ass, lived on meat and Jack Daniels. Beans when he wanted to healthy up. He's now up in rocker's paradise, stomping the living shit out of any being daring to fucking bother him with any goddamn ledger.

The good ones die, certainly, at 70 he lived a life and thirteen halves, but yeah. Meanwhile, Taylor Useless Swift and vapid collection of boat anchor raw material Ed Sheeran still sell records.

Son of a bitch.

My first time:


Do not rest in peace, boss, own that fucking place and raid the liquor cabinet.

Dammit.

The Jon Swift Memorial Round Up Is Out

From batocchio, doing the work of the the angels, or more entertaining devils, the Jon Swift Memorial Roundup is out. I've already read about a half a dozen, some great stuff. Give those folks some love and linkage!

#jonswift2015

Disclosure: I submitted, one of my more vicious posts, maybe not the right one, but I went for the snark.

Christmas Linkees

paleo Christmas programming!

ENJOY!!